My heart is yearning and desiring a change and a deeper relationship, and when I don't know how to respond or fix things, I seek solace in music. So I pulled out a cd that I haven't listened to in a long time, and that brought my search to the internet and videos and I came across a song that didn't always effect me the way it does now. It stirs my heart. He is calling me.
Worlds Apart ~ Jars of Clay
I am the only one to blame for this
Somehow it all ends up the same
Soaring on the wings of selfish pride
I flew too high and like Icarus I collide
With a world I try so hard to leave behind
To rid myself of all but love
to give and die
To turn away and not become
Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves
more deeply than the oceans,
more abundant than the tears
Of a world embracing every heartache
Can I be the one to sacrifice
Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - I am on my knees
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - broken on my knees
All said and done I stand alone
Amongst remains of a life I should not own
It takes all I am to believe
In the mercy that covers me
Did you really have to die for me?
All I am for all you are
Because what I need and what I believe are worlds apart
[Additional lyrics:]
I look beyond the empty cross
forgetting what my life has cost
and wipe away the crimson stains
and dull the nails that still remain
More and more I need you now,
I owe you more each passing hour
the battle between grace and pride
I gave up not so long ago
So steal my heart and take the pain
and wash the feet and cleanse my pride
take the selfish, take the weak,
and all the things I cannot hide
take the beauty, take my tears
the sin-soaked heart and make it yours
take my world all apart
take it now, take it now
and serve the ones that I despise
speak the words I can't deny
watch the world I used to love
fall to dust and thrown away
I look beyond the empty cross
forgetting what my life has cost
so wipe away the crimson stains
and dull the nails that still remain
so steal my heart and take the pain
take the selfish, take the weak
and all the things I cannot hide
take the beauty, take my tears
take my world apart, take my world apart
I pray, I pray, I pray
take my world apart
I love to write. I think too much. I want the world to make sense. I am an optimist. I have everything I've ever wanted, but I still want more. I am loyal. To a fault. I have a lot of growing to do still. I want God to use me but struggle to give Him full control. I love my whole big family. I've been married for 15 years to my Hunny. I have 5 energetic and wonderful children here with me and 3 waiting in heaven. I love being creative. I think there is too much stuff in this world that I want to do still. I think everything is relevant. I think that I don't make a lot of sense.
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