Saturday, July 7, 2007
For some reason today….07-07-07….. is supposed to be considered a "lucky" day. I'm not too sure why that is or what exactly that means, but I know a lot of people have gotten married today! I know also that the number 7 (as well as the number 40) have great significance in the Bible, but I also don't know why. Something about it being a "perfect" number I think. But whatever the story behind today's date, I don't feel that it was a spectacular day. Quite the opposite actually.
Well, there is One Good thing that occurred today and that is the 30th birthday of my wonderful and dear friend, Heather, who lives back in Ontario. Yay! I miss her so much! :( The worst part is that we haven't talked in a few months. (she's a very busy girl) so I feel a bit out of the loop, so to say. I hope that whatever happened to her today, it was grand. I'm dying to know how her boyfriend surprised her today!
But that aside….
I had my first ever Open House to celebrate the brand-new Fall/Winter Collection from Stampin' Up! I was very excited and nervous. The typical thoughts run through your head: will people come? But I managed to prepare and try to keep a positive thought on things. I knew for sure that my sister was coming, and so that was one! :) My neighbour also came. That was two. And that was it. I was sooooo disappointed. I know that today was a very busy day (weddings, you know, lol) and that it wasn't personal, but you feel crappy anyways. *sigh* I am determined not to let it get me down though. I just wish I could've sold off my old products to make way for the new ones! Blah! Oh well, I guess I'll have to be creative this summer. At least my first Stamp Club is starting this Wednesday! Yay! I have 8 women in the group and I am so excited about the project we're making!!! Jono came up with the concept…*smile*
*sigh*
deep breath
And now on to the worst news of the day…
I found out that my friend's baby died today and my heart is slowly shattering. I was fearing any emails from her child's page on caringbridge as I was waiting to hear the news. The poor baby just wasn't born healthy and it hurts. I can not even begin to imagine what my friend is going through, but she used the words that she felt like she was killing her child as baby girl slowly slipped away struggling. I remember feeling the same way when I was administered methotrexare after my first ectopic pregnancy. I didn't get the chance to hold my baby or see the pain she went through, so I was spared, but I know the hollowness.
I have been crying today on and off and praying constantly for the family. Will you please pray for them too, with me? Their little girl was born 10 weeks too soon and the blessed thing is that she is whole now in Heaven, but she had to leave behind a heartbroken mother, father and two older sisters. Please pray for peace and strength for them. Pray that they will be able to find comfort in the arms of our loving Father, who creates life and is broken when one is cut short too.
Lissa, I don't have the words, but my heart is crying for you and is broken.
Today is not a lucky day for me.
I hope everyone else' day was better.
Well, there is One Good thing that occurred today and that is the 30th birthday of my wonderful and dear friend, Heather, who lives back in Ontario. Yay! I miss her so much! :( The worst part is that we haven't talked in a few months. (she's a very busy girl) so I feel a bit out of the loop, so to say. I hope that whatever happened to her today, it was grand. I'm dying to know how her boyfriend surprised her today!
But that aside….
I had my first ever Open House to celebrate the brand-new Fall/Winter Collection from Stampin' Up! I was very excited and nervous. The typical thoughts run through your head: will people come? But I managed to prepare and try to keep a positive thought on things. I knew for sure that my sister was coming, and so that was one! :) My neighbour also came. That was two. And that was it. I was sooooo disappointed. I know that today was a very busy day (weddings, you know, lol) and that it wasn't personal, but you feel crappy anyways. *sigh* I am determined not to let it get me down though. I just wish I could've sold off my old products to make way for the new ones! Blah! Oh well, I guess I'll have to be creative this summer. At least my first Stamp Club is starting this Wednesday! Yay! I have 8 women in the group and I am so excited about the project we're making!!! Jono came up with the concept…*smile*
*sigh*
deep breath
And now on to the worst news of the day…
I found out that my friend's baby died today and my heart is slowly shattering. I was fearing any emails from her child's page on caringbridge as I was waiting to hear the news. The poor baby just wasn't born healthy and it hurts. I can not even begin to imagine what my friend is going through, but she used the words that she felt like she was killing her child as baby girl slowly slipped away struggling. I remember feeling the same way when I was administered methotrexare after my first ectopic pregnancy. I didn't get the chance to hold my baby or see the pain she went through, so I was spared, but I know the hollowness.
I have been crying today on and off and praying constantly for the family. Will you please pray for them too, with me? Their little girl was born 10 weeks too soon and the blessed thing is that she is whole now in Heaven, but she had to leave behind a heartbroken mother, father and two older sisters. Please pray for peace and strength for them. Pray that they will be able to find comfort in the arms of our loving Father, who creates life and is broken when one is cut short too.
Lissa, I don't have the words, but my heart is crying for you and is broken.
Today is not a lucky day for me.
I hope everyone else' day was better.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
At around noon today I had a diabetic reaction. It was quite strange. I was feeling weak, then I got shakey and really thirsty and tired and felt like passing out. I had two bananas and some water and I still felt crappy, so I checked my blood sugar levels, but since it's been a while I forgot how to do it! But in the end it worked. They were 4.9 —of course I have no idea what that means! (roll eyes) I sat in the bathroom just so weak, with my head on the counter. I was feeling a bit better by 12:30pm, so I made some grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch, but my legs were still weak and shakey and I was still so tired. I ended up laying down for an hour after 1pm b/c I knew if I didn't I'd collapse!
It was quite strange. I felt terrible. I looked terrible. I had both my husband and his sister ask me "are you okay?" within 5ms of eachother! Of course, in my attempts to be more honest and seek out help, I said, "no!" And they both turned away!!!! What's up with that??? Why ask if you don't care or have an interest in helping??? I just don't get it! I mean, I LOOK terrible, I feel like I"m actually physically going to collapse and yet they still didn't offer anything! I am appalled the more I think of it.
But let's not get me started. What's up with the diabetic reaction? I was convinced that's what it was, and have actually been wondering if I have developed diabetes recently. I had Gestational Diabetes during my pregnancy, but my test afterwards came back normal. I know they're going to test me again but I can't remember if it's every 6ms or every year. I see my doctor on Monday and I'll be mentioning this for sure!
I took an online risk assesment for diabetes and according to my height, weight, age and parent with diabetes, I scored 11… when 10+ is High Risk! LOL …of course, I knew that anyways, but thought I'd check it out! {here is the link: http://www.diabetes.org/risk-test.jsp }
I'm going to start walking daily with my neighbour for 1/2 hour. We're starting on Sunday evening. No kids (other than Bryn) I'm really looking forwards to that. That should help with weight loss, and get me healthier. I hope we can keep up with it and that our husbands help us out too.
So that was my day…. phew! Oh! And I finally got new contacts! YAY! About time! I had to get an Emergency pair of contacts way back in March b/c my old ones were soooo old it was ridiculous. So I picked up one to last the month since I had an eye appointment in the next week and would likely buy new ones if my script changed. Well…. three and a half months have passed and my eyes did change but we didn't buy new contacts yet. *blush* The past two weeks have been painful for me, as my eyes are constantly sore and itchy and irritated, so I've been going without the past two days, blurry vision and all! This afternoon, I rubbed my eyes and lost my right contact, relocated it and tried to put it back in when I saw it was torn. Drat!!! At least it got me out to buy new good clean contacts though! ;) So I'm seeing with "new" eyes again, yay! How nice to see things so crisp and clear. I'd like to buy some glasses again too, just to have, but I'm having a hard time justifying the price to my stringy Hunny (lol) and finding a pair that suits me. *sigh* But this is a start…
It was quite strange. I felt terrible. I looked terrible. I had both my husband and his sister ask me "are you okay?" within 5ms of eachother! Of course, in my attempts to be more honest and seek out help, I said, "no!" And they both turned away!!!! What's up with that??? Why ask if you don't care or have an interest in helping??? I just don't get it! I mean, I LOOK terrible, I feel like I"m actually physically going to collapse and yet they still didn't offer anything! I am appalled the more I think of it.
But let's not get me started. What's up with the diabetic reaction? I was convinced that's what it was, and have actually been wondering if I have developed diabetes recently. I had Gestational Diabetes during my pregnancy, but my test afterwards came back normal. I know they're going to test me again but I can't remember if it's every 6ms or every year. I see my doctor on Monday and I'll be mentioning this for sure!
I took an online risk assesment for diabetes and according to my height, weight, age and parent with diabetes, I scored 11… when 10+ is High Risk! LOL …of course, I knew that anyways, but thought I'd check it out! {here is the link: http://www.diabetes.org/risk-test.jsp }
I'm going to start walking daily with my neighbour for 1/2 hour. We're starting on Sunday evening. No kids (other than Bryn) I'm really looking forwards to that. That should help with weight loss, and get me healthier. I hope we can keep up with it and that our husbands help us out too.
So that was my day…. phew! Oh! And I finally got new contacts! YAY! About time! I had to get an Emergency pair of contacts way back in March b/c my old ones were soooo old it was ridiculous. So I picked up one to last the month since I had an eye appointment in the next week and would likely buy new ones if my script changed. Well…. three and a half months have passed and my eyes did change but we didn't buy new contacts yet. *blush* The past two weeks have been painful for me, as my eyes are constantly sore and itchy and irritated, so I've been going without the past two days, blurry vision and all! This afternoon, I rubbed my eyes and lost my right contact, relocated it and tried to put it back in when I saw it was torn. Drat!!! At least it got me out to buy new good clean contacts though! ;) So I'm seeing with "new" eyes again, yay! How nice to see things so crisp and clear. I'd like to buy some glasses again too, just to have, but I'm having a hard time justifying the price to my stringy Hunny (lol) and finding a pair that suits me. *sigh* But this is a start…
Thursday, June 21, 2007
A more sombre entry after the two fun ones…
Kai had his very first Weekly Speech Therapy on Wednesday (which I nearly forgot all about but remembered the night before, phew!) I was aprehensive on how it would turn out since as the months have gone on, he has responded to Linda more and more negatively. If you recall, last month he turned his back to her at our house and didn't respond but pouted. This month we are at the Surrey Early Speech & Language (SESLP…I just can't remember what the P stands for, lol) building.
Kai did fine. He was ready to go, was happy to get there, played well with the toys, but immediately shied when Linda arrived to take us to our room. He warmed up a bit and sat at the table with her and said, "yeah" that he wanted to play a game, so all was going well. Or so I thought. But then she asked him to do something. And that's when the ST went downhill.
He refused. Absolutely. Refused. Would NOT do it. Not attempt it. Didn't even want to.
All she asked him to do was POINT. She knows he can do that and so she wants him to feel less pressure and more confident doing the things that he CAN do instead of focusing on speech. (meanwhile I'm biting my tongue b/c I KNOW he can SAY the word "UP") The task was that he HAD to point "UP" with his finger if he wanted the penguin to climb the stairs. (do you remember the toy where the penguins climb this moving stairs to the top and then slide down and climb back up with the battery-operated button?) She did manage to catch him sneakily…he was rubbing his nose, and she claimed it as him pointing! So she turned on the toy and up climbed the penguin, and then down he slid and made it to the bottom again. Kai liked that. Then she turned it off, added another penguin so there were two, and asked him to POINT again.
He refused. But instead of just slouching in his chair and pouting, he started up with the crocodile tears! He did a bit of a whine and turned in his chair and refused to even look at her! When she asked him to just point again, he started to cry again and it went on and one. He literally cried for half an hour!!!!!!
He's sniffling, rubbing his eyes, crying… and I'm trying to pretend I'm not there!!! I just didn't know what to do or think. Is this what we're supposed to do? Are we really supposed to frustrate him so much that he is forced into this? Is this just "crocodile tears" of frustration, a sort of temper tantrum, or is this really him being upset and feeling cornered? I'm not too sure how I feel about it. A part of me wonders if I'm too "soft" on him and let him get away with a lot by not forcing him like she tried. Should I be doing that at home? Not giving in, even if it makes him throw a fit and cry? I don't know. I suppose in some ways I should… but I've also tried that several times at her suggestion and I haven't noticed it work at all yet!!! But, is that MY fault b/c I haven't tried hard enough and stuck with it or is it just something that's not going to work for him?
*sigh* Sorry, that's a lot of questions, isn't it? I'm just not too sure what to do for my little guy. Our ST is supposed to last an hour, but at 10:40, she let us go home. Kai cried and sniffed and clung to me in my arms all the way to the car, and then settled down as we prepared to leave. Of course he "chatted" on the way home too!!! I even got him to SAY "up"!!!! AND point it!!!!! (roll eyes) I asked him why he wouldn't do it for Linda, but he just looked down and didn't have an answer. *sigh* Neither do I.
I felt sooo disheartened by it. So I've decided that we'll try this weekly thing out for her plan. She wants to meet for 6 weeks, then break for summer and then start up again in Septemeber. I think that if we don't see any change in him by 6 weeks, I'm going to look into a new therapist. I mean, sheesh! Kai is getting WORSE with her, not better!!! He's Refusing to work with her!!! Is that due to his stubborness or because she's just not fitting him well? He'll be Four in November, and although he has grown Immensely the past few months, I want to see him closer to his peers with speech and he's only nearly a 2 year old's, and that is not acceptable.
Kai had his very first Weekly Speech Therapy on Wednesday (which I nearly forgot all about but remembered the night before, phew!) I was aprehensive on how it would turn out since as the months have gone on, he has responded to Linda more and more negatively. If you recall, last month he turned his back to her at our house and didn't respond but pouted. This month we are at the Surrey Early Speech & Language (SESLP…I just can't remember what the P stands for, lol) building.
Kai did fine. He was ready to go, was happy to get there, played well with the toys, but immediately shied when Linda arrived to take us to our room. He warmed up a bit and sat at the table with her and said, "yeah" that he wanted to play a game, so all was going well. Or so I thought. But then she asked him to do something. And that's when the ST went downhill.
He refused. Absolutely. Refused. Would NOT do it. Not attempt it. Didn't even want to.
All she asked him to do was POINT. She knows he can do that and so she wants him to feel less pressure and more confident doing the things that he CAN do instead of focusing on speech. (meanwhile I'm biting my tongue b/c I KNOW he can SAY the word "UP") The task was that he HAD to point "UP" with his finger if he wanted the penguin to climb the stairs. (do you remember the toy where the penguins climb this moving stairs to the top and then slide down and climb back up with the battery-operated button?) She did manage to catch him sneakily…he was rubbing his nose, and she claimed it as him pointing! So she turned on the toy and up climbed the penguin, and then down he slid and made it to the bottom again. Kai liked that. Then she turned it off, added another penguin so there were two, and asked him to POINT again.
He refused. But instead of just slouching in his chair and pouting, he started up with the crocodile tears! He did a bit of a whine and turned in his chair and refused to even look at her! When she asked him to just point again, he started to cry again and it went on and one. He literally cried for half an hour!!!!!!
He's sniffling, rubbing his eyes, crying… and I'm trying to pretend I'm not there!!! I just didn't know what to do or think. Is this what we're supposed to do? Are we really supposed to frustrate him so much that he is forced into this? Is this just "crocodile tears" of frustration, a sort of temper tantrum, or is this really him being upset and feeling cornered? I'm not too sure how I feel about it. A part of me wonders if I'm too "soft" on him and let him get away with a lot by not forcing him like she tried. Should I be doing that at home? Not giving in, even if it makes him throw a fit and cry? I don't know. I suppose in some ways I should… but I've also tried that several times at her suggestion and I haven't noticed it work at all yet!!! But, is that MY fault b/c I haven't tried hard enough and stuck with it or is it just something that's not going to work for him?
*sigh* Sorry, that's a lot of questions, isn't it? I'm just not too sure what to do for my little guy. Our ST is supposed to last an hour, but at 10:40, she let us go home. Kai cried and sniffed and clung to me in my arms all the way to the car, and then settled down as we prepared to leave. Of course he "chatted" on the way home too!!! I even got him to SAY "up"!!!! AND point it!!!!! (roll eyes) I asked him why he wouldn't do it for Linda, but he just looked down and didn't have an answer. *sigh* Neither do I.
I felt sooo disheartened by it. So I've decided that we'll try this weekly thing out for her plan. She wants to meet for 6 weeks, then break for summer and then start up again in Septemeber. I think that if we don't see any change in him by 6 weeks, I'm going to look into a new therapist. I mean, sheesh! Kai is getting WORSE with her, not better!!! He's Refusing to work with her!!! Is that due to his stubborness or because she's just not fitting him well? He'll be Four in November, and although he has grown Immensely the past few months, I want to see him closer to his peers with speech and he's only nearly a 2 year old's, and that is not acceptable.
I woke up one morning to find that my panty liners had been pifiled through. Oh great! *groan* They were ALL over the place! …that is…the peel-off backings were!!!! The liners themselves were elsewhere to be found.
And found I did. All over Abi's stuffie!!!!
I asked Abi why she used them up, reminding her that they were mine and she shouldn't go through Mommy's things. She sheepishly replied that she knew that, but she wanted to make her dinosaur into a "stegasaurus"!!!! I can't help it: I LAUGHED!!!! With Glee, too! She just cracks me up! It's hard not to find this humerous, you know? I'm not too sure how plastering panty liners all over a stuffy will make it into a stegasaurus, but she was convinced her dino needed padding!!!! LOL!
Hearing my giggles made Abi feel better, and so when I pulled out my camera she wanted to pose with it. You'll note how Proud she looks!!!!! That's my creative girl! I'll be pulling this out when she's a teenager and she will DIE of embarrassment!!!! BWAAHAAAHAAA!!!
And found I did. All over Abi's stuffie!!!!
I asked Abi why she used them up, reminding her that they were mine and she shouldn't go through Mommy's things. She sheepishly replied that she knew that, but she wanted to make her dinosaur into a "stegasaurus"!!!! I can't help it: I LAUGHED!!!! With Glee, too! She just cracks me up! It's hard not to find this humerous, you know? I'm not too sure how plastering panty liners all over a stuffy will make it into a stegasaurus, but she was convinced her dino needed padding!!!! LOL!
Hearing my giggles made Abi feel better, and so when I pulled out my camera she wanted to pose with it. You'll note how Proud she looks!!!!! That's my creative girl! I'll be pulling this out when she's a teenager and she will DIE of embarrassment!!!! BWAAHAAAHAAA!!!
Yay!!! Bryn has his first tooth!!!! You can't quite see it, but you can definitely feel it! (believe me, lol) It's so exciting! I've been waiting and waiting… I figured he wouldn't get his teeth until he was 9 months old b/c Abi & Kai were that age when they got theirs, but 9 months came and went and nothing. Darn! But here it is, poking out, making him into more of a Big Boy! I can't wait to get some photos of it for you! *big grin*
I did finally take the "traditional" family photo though. That is, I finally got him in the Yellow Outfit! This is a polyester (translate: not comfy or soft) yellow two-piece baby shorts set that Daddy wore when he was a baby! I was lucky enough to have my Mother-in-Law save it all these years (and it is in excellent condition too) and so all three children have had their turn in the outfit their first summer. Jonathan was 3 months old, and Abi & Kai were around 7 or 8 months old, and Bryn is 10 months old….shows you the size difference between the kids and their Daddy, eh? LOL
Bryn has also been Really chatty too, making all sorts of noises and trying to "speak". It is so exciting to hear and makes me so happy. How can you Not grin when your baby is blowing raspberries and screaming, "gagaga….lalalalala…..bbbbbbb"??? LOL He is SUCH a cutie. I'm sure I felt this enamoured with the other two, but it's funny how you forget and get so caught up in the love and joy of a new baby. I managed to snap a shot of Bryn blowing raspberries for me! (oh, and the cut on his face was put there by himself! This boy has got SHARP claws…I mean nails!!!!! even when they're trimmed!!!!)
I did finally take the "traditional" family photo though. That is, I finally got him in the Yellow Outfit! This is a polyester (translate: not comfy or soft) yellow two-piece baby shorts set that Daddy wore when he was a baby! I was lucky enough to have my Mother-in-Law save it all these years (and it is in excellent condition too) and so all three children have had their turn in the outfit their first summer. Jonathan was 3 months old, and Abi & Kai were around 7 or 8 months old, and Bryn is 10 months old….shows you the size difference between the kids and their Daddy, eh? LOL
Bryn has also been Really chatty too, making all sorts of noises and trying to "speak". It is so exciting to hear and makes me so happy. How can you Not grin when your baby is blowing raspberries and screaming, "gagaga….lalalalala…..bbbbbbb"??? LOL He is SUCH a cutie. I'm sure I felt this enamoured with the other two, but it's funny how you forget and get so caught up in the love and joy of a new baby. I managed to snap a shot of Bryn blowing raspberries for me! (oh, and the cut on his face was put there by himself! This boy has got SHARP claws…I mean nails!!!!! even when they're trimmed!!!!)
Sunday, June 17, 2007
I had some concerns about Bryn gagging on foods thicker than puree and talked to the ped about it a few weeks ago, and he said that it could be that he's not used to it or that there is a real issue there. If he continued to gag on foods he liked then we would have to do a barium swollow on him to see if there was any damage from the reflux. But I am HAPPY to say that he is doing GREAT with eating now too!!! Not only does he try to stuff everything into his mouth all the time, but he's mucking up foods all the time now! LOL He can do bread, baby cookies, muffins, hmm…what else? I'm going to get Cheerios this week for him! YAY!!!!
Just thought I'd better update the masses! LOL
Just thought I'd better update the masses! LOL
Saturday, June 16, 2007
What is it about the truth that makes it so hard to tell? Why is it that you feel worse after telling the truth than if you had lied?
I had to tell my friend tonight that I wasn't going to go over to her BBQ anymore. I had originally planned to go and was looking forwards to it, but today just hit me hard. I am WIPED. Literally. I mean, I've been having a really hard time keeping my eyes open today! So I am out of energy. Even my desires don't outweigh my energy, which is so disappointing. So I had to cancel.
I could've lied. I could've said that I didn't find a babysitter, sorry. Or that my husband was going out and so I couldn't. Or that I was sick or that one of the kids were sick. Or that we had forgotten or made other plans we had forgotten about. But the truth is, I am too wiped to go, and I stuck with that. But for some reason I felt worse for saying that. I wonder if a lie would've slipped off my tongue easier? Would I have felt a little less guilty? Because cancelling made me feel bad.
I hate the way I feel. I am so sick of being tired. No. WIPED. I am tired of being wiped.
I had to tell my friend tonight that I wasn't going to go over to her BBQ anymore. I had originally planned to go and was looking forwards to it, but today just hit me hard. I am WIPED. Literally. I mean, I've been having a really hard time keeping my eyes open today! So I am out of energy. Even my desires don't outweigh my energy, which is so disappointing. So I had to cancel.
I could've lied. I could've said that I didn't find a babysitter, sorry. Or that my husband was going out and so I couldn't. Or that I was sick or that one of the kids were sick. Or that we had forgotten or made other plans we had forgotten about. But the truth is, I am too wiped to go, and I stuck with that. But for some reason I felt worse for saying that. I wonder if a lie would've slipped off my tongue easier? Would I have felt a little less guilty? Because cancelling made me feel bad.
I hate the way I feel. I am so sick of being tired. No. WIPED. I am tired of being wiped.
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